This is What Love Looks Like

holding hands

Love is one of those things that is highly subjective. Everyone has their own ideas and fantasies about love and in general, I say good for them. After all, everyone has the right to their own dream romances, right? What may be mundane for some may be romantic for another and vice versa. That being said, this new breed of fictional ‘dream’ boyfriends that girls seem to be swooning over these days really piss me off.

And yes, I’m looking at you Twilight and Fifty Shades of Grey. The quality of the writing style aside, these books are not just ‘bad’ for impressionable young girls, they’re down right dangerous in the life lessons they appear to be imparting.

Ladies, I’ll put it bluntly: if you think Edward Cullen and Christian Grey are the height of romance and love, please hit yourselves over the head with the nearest piece of furniture to save me the trouble of having to do it myself. If you think these characters, who exemplify over possessiveness at best and a stalker-ish behaviour and abuse at worst, are romantic then you really don’t know what love is. Love isn’t just the grand gestures and physical attraction, it’s so much more than that. Love is:

– Getting out of bed to get your pregnant wife a double chocolate fudge brownie at 2am just because she’s craving it

– Watching My Fair Lady with your wife because its her favourite movie and not complaining during or after the movie even though you’re bored to death throughout

although how anyone can NOT love this movie is beyond me :p
although how anyone can NOT love this movie is beyond me :p

– Making your husband’s favourite food for dinner even though you really don’t like it

– Picking up after yourself even when you’re getting late for work just so your sleep-deprived wife has less housework to do and can catch a nap with the baby

– Making it a point to say please and thank you even for the little things so your spouse doesn’t feel under-appreciated

– Forgoing that really lovely new dress you saw at the store so you can save up to buy a nice present for your husband’s birthday next month

– Being patient when your spouse is venting instead of screaming back at him/her

– Understanding the need for (and encouraging) time not spent together

– Making the effort to take your wife out to dinner because you promised even though work ran late and you’re dead tired

– Insisting on staying home and watching a movie instead of going out like you had planned because you can see that your husband is dead tired

– Not holding a grudge

caring for each other even when you're fighting
caring for each other even when you’re fighting

This is just a drop in the bottomless ocean that is love, but you get the idea. Love is more than what these new breed of ‘romance’ novels seem to make it out to be, and if you really think Twilight has got love figured out, then you just probably haven’t been in love yet.

 

What does love look like for you? What would you add to this list?

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10 thoughts on “This is What Love Looks Like

    1. True love I believe in, it’s just the version of true love presented in these books that I object to! And yes, fairy tales aren’t exactly great at presenting healthy relationships but at least disney is getting better at it now

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  1. Love is saying the same phrase every night of your marriage because neither one of you can fall asleep without it:
    Me: Goodnight.
    Him: See you in the morning.
    Me: I’ll be right here.
    Him: Sleep well.
    Me: You too.
    Us: Love you.

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  2. Love is washing up the dishes…it’s getting up to the sick toddler at 3am…it’s a message in the middle of the day that makes me smile…it’s listening to gross nursing stories while you eat. 🙂

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  3. Oh, that is one powerful burst of frustration with modern romantic novels 🙂 Putting aside that I am forever Ann Rice fan and cannot enjoy Twilight even in theory ;), My Fair Lady being one of the most true-love-warmth-filled movie (and the book!) and I grew up reading the Forsyte Saga in its entirety very early in my teens (shh! don’t tell anyone!), Love is indeed so much more! Let’s keep it up! Someone has to set an example, right? 😉

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    1. Hahaha! So true! I’m with you on Anne Rice fans not being capable of enjoying Twilight! Lestat would slap Edward to death if they ever met :p And yes, nothing beats My Fair Lady in the romance department 🙂

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